Friday, June 17, 2011

Fearless

I've been gardening lately...much to the surprise of my family and friends. You see, I am not an outdoorsy girl. I don't like outside. It is hot. And buggy. And there is wildlife, and I don't like wildlife. I don't like snakes, and truth be told, I'm not a fan of birds either. Birds on the other hand, love me. I'm like Snow White. I go outside, and birds flock to me, much to my fear.

Fear. I'm discovering that I've been living in fear. Fear of failing, messing up, getting hurt, getting scared, whatever. So I don't try new things. Because I don't want to risk not being perfect. But writing has helped me become fearless.

To write means to risk rejection. Well, more accurately, to submit your writing means to risk rejection. But to seek publication, one must submit. And I'm getting acceptance! Yes, rejections come too. But the funny thing is, they don't hurt so much. So I don't fear them anymore.

The gardening? The first week I saw 6 snakes! Literally I haven't seen a snake in years, and SIX?? Was that the devil saying "get back in the house!" I don't know, but I kept "digging." I've also had 3 ticks. But I'm fearless.

And yes, the stupid voles have eaten some of what I've planted. But so what! I'll keep digging. Because the end result doesn't have to be perfect. The important thing is I'm doing it.

The only thing that's been holding me back is me. And I'm letting me go. And I'm trusting God. And I'm fearless.

Chatty Kelly